I will get OT on Yo' Ass - By Luke

So I called in to Rob's to congratulate him on the call up for Sunday. His garden still looks a bit bare after the locusts, but roses are for girls, really. I reckon a good cobblelocking was in order. Maybe Stephen Ferris could sort him out. Anyway, I was thinkin' it looked like his luck was back.
Then I noticed a plume of smoke rising up from the patio round the back.
Everyone likes a good house fire, I know, but seeing the run of luck the guy's had I decided I'd better pop the head round and see what's what. Not actually tackle the fire, but at least see if An Brogaid Doitean needed to be called.

Turned out it was Roberino, standing over a barbecue.
"Robbieeeee !" I go.
"Luuuuukieee! " he goes, a big grin on him, just like old times. " Step in, my brovvvver!"
" Throw an old prawn on the barbie for me, will ya?" I go, opening the gate.
"No can do, pal o' mine." He goes, fiving me.
"Why not ? Saving it all for yo' mama? She so fat." I says, chuckling.
" Because this is not a barbeque, you Gaelic speaking gobdaw." he says.
"Well it certainly looks like one, you disease ridden poxbag." I go, reaching for a tongs.
He slapped them away from my hand, got serious.
"This is not for us, man. This is for You-Know-Who."
"My Cuz? He's calling over? Wow, duder, you must really be back in with him."
"He's not calling over Luke."

He looked around, leaned in close. "Two words for you, Luke. Burnt."
He looked around again.
"Offerings."
It took me a second.
"You have finally lost it. Burnt offerings, like in the Old Testament. Burning goats to Gods in temples, and all that? Thats completely mental." I told him, genuinely shocked
" Am I back in with him?" he asked.
I had to nod.
" The Old Testament." He grinned, and turned back to it. "It's my new Bible."

Well, whatever it takes to get your confidence back, I guess.